IELTS Writing Task 1: my 10 sentences

Last week I explained how to write 10 sentences about the chart below.

Average weekly household expenditure by region, 2007-09

Weekly expenditure (£)

Here are my 10 sentences:

1. The bar chart shows average weekly spending by households in different areas of England between 2007 and 2009.
2. Households in the south of the country spent more on average than those in the north.
3. Average weekly spending by households was highest in London and lowest in the North East.
4. English households spent on average around £470 per week.
5. The average expenditure for households in London was about £560 per week, almost £100 more than the overall figure for England.
6. Households in the South East, East and South West also spent more than the national average.
7. Weekly household spending figures for those three regions were approximately £520, £490 and £480 respectively.
8. Similar levels of household spending were seen in the West Midlands, the North West and the East Midlands, at about £430 to £450 per week.
9. In the region of Yorkshire and the Humber, households spent approximately £400 per week, while expenditure in the North East was around £10 per week lower than this.
10. It is noticeable that average weekly expenditure by households in the North East was around £80 less than the national average, and around £170 less than the London average.

Comments

[manisha]

HELLO SIMON,
you have compared the figures to national average figure.will my answer be considered wrong if i mention the national average in overall trend and make comparisons among all the regions in paragraphs without comparing them to national average.

[Simon]

Hi Manisha,

There isn't a perfect way to answer. It's nice to compare with the national average, but it isn't vital - your answer certainly won't be considered wrong.

[Melisa]

Simon, your answer is amazing! thank you so much!

[manisha]

thanks simon.

[Amin]

Hi Simon :) My result for test at 15, September announced
Ls:7 Rd:8 Wrt:6 Spk:6.5 // Overall:7.00
Center: IDP ,Malaysia
For writing test, while I didn't reach 250 words, luckily I could get 6.00

My 1st IELTS result was:
Ls:6.5 Rd:6.5 Wrt:5 Spk:6 Overall:6.
Center:British Council, Malaysia (2011)

Appreciate for your efforts and awesome daily courses

[Masud Ahmed]

Hi Simon!
I have got my result today:
MASUD AHMED

Test Centre Number: PK175
Test Date: 15/09/2012

Listening 7.5, Reading 8.0, Writing 7.0, Speaking 7.0 Overall 7.5

I needed 7.0 in each section. So, I am very happy today.

[Rainy]

Hi Simon,
Your sample is extremely useful but i think when connect them to create an essay, it may be repetition for " average, average weekly spending". Can you help me in finding others relevant phrases for this essay?
Thank you so much!

[Azadeh]

Hi Simon,

What is the difference between "could" and "should"? Both can be used for suggestion. and also is " could" just use for past tense suggestion?

Thanks for your time

[Azadeh]

Hi again,

Also. Would is used for the suggestion in the future?

[Simon]

FROM SIMON:

I'm afraid I no longer have time to answer everyone's questions individually. However, I do still read them all, and I try to answer some questions in a lesson once a week (usually Saturdays).

...

Congratulations Amin and Masud!

[Md. Kamal Hossain]

Hello Masud,

Congrats!!! On your brilliant success we wish a good hope.................
Kamal, from Bangladesh.

Plz connect me at my skype:mdkamalhossain1976

[Prince]

Hello sir,

i had given IELTS exam on 15/09/2012.my result is not so good, my result

Listening: 5.5
Reading: 6.5
Writing: 5.0
Speaking: 5.0

Overall: 5.5

but i needed 5.5 in each. now i am planning to give it again.

What would i do for improving score in writing and speaking

[yap]

South East count as 1 or 2 words?
Sorry i have forgot about this.

[Minku]

Hello Simon,

When I first looked at this chart I thought "average spending on household expenditure" means how much people are spending on the expenditure required for the household.
Am I completely wrong interpreting the question this way. Suppose, rest of my writing is and good enough for band 8, how much will I be penalized interpreting the question in a different way.

Please répond to my query.
I will be very grateful

[Andy]

Hi Simon

Thank you for your excellent essay. I'd corrected my essay by referring to yours after I finished it.

The bar chart illustrates the average weekly spending by household in the different ten countries from 2007 to 2009.

It is clear that family live in the southern area tend to spend on average more money than the family in northern area. What is more, the figure is highest in London and lowest in North East area.

The average weekly family expenditure in London and South East area were the only two figures over £500, which were around £500 and £520 respectively. Around £480 of the spending were seen in North East and average England family, while the figure for East area was a bit higher, with approximately £490.

Similar levels of household spending were seen in South West, West Midlands and North West, at around £450, £430 and £420 per week respectively. Family in Yorkshire and The Humber spent £400 per week, while the expenditure in North East area per week was about just £20 lower than this.

[Hai Nhien]

Hi Simon,

Could we use "the number of household expenditure..." or "the avarage of ..." in this case? In saw that u did not use like that? And is it formal or not? Pls help me to explain and point out that when we could or could not (if any).

Thank you.

Look forward to hearing from you.

[TL]

Thanks so much !!! Ur website is so helpful.