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March 25, 2015

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Classic essay!
Thank you.

It's great to see your essay, Simon, thanks! It seems you have expressed your point of view honestly.

Hi Simon,

Good essay, but do you think it seems simple and easy? I expected to see much more difficult words in it.

Simon,

Thank you for your brilliant essay. It is so beautifully written and easily the best.

Hi Dear Simon,
Thank you very much for your excellent work and essay help again...Brilliant essay your tips are most helpful… keep on writing, looking forward to read more .

An excellent essay as usual. Thank you Simon! To me it seems bizarre that students are so fixated on "difficult" words. Under exam condition, if one makes not even one grammar or word choice mistake that is considered a feat already. Besides, the reason you feel the essay is simple, easy is because it has a nice flow throughout and thus you can comprehend it fully, which is exactly what band 9 Cohesion and Coherence is about!

I think "Usually" in the first body paragraph, line 8, should be deleted.
This is my introduction:

Since the evolution of societies and cultures, women's activities have been restricted to inside houses to raise children, cook and clean while their husbands have been outside hunting and working. However, this trend is no longer true as nowadays, increasing number of females have outdoor type of jobs and careers and more fathers are involved in household chores. The change is mainly because of gender equality, more freedom of women and their higher education levels in the modern world and I believe this trend in positive and beneficial for societies.

Another nice and neat essay, with clear opinions and relevant ideas to support, as well as appropriate (yet not difficult) vocabulary.But I noticed in the introduction: ...to take on the role of househusband, should an article (the) be prior to "househusband" since the latter is a countable noun?

Hi everyone,

I am trying to improve my speaking skills. If you want to practise with me, please add my skype account. My account is vohoanganh201.

Thank you and regards.

speak skype audio call :sabbirmd100

Pouyan

We are not so interested in words - we are more looking for combinations of words (collocations), such as 'pursue a career' and 'socially acceptable for'. Simon's essay has many impressive collocations like these.

@Sjm,

Thank you, as here in Iran I some teachers tend to see essays with difficult words and advanced grammar, as when they saw essays like this, wouldn't score it much more 7.5-8. Then I got in two minds whether which one is best to follow.

Pouyan

This essay is clearly a 9. Apart from the fact that it answers the question it contains no grammatical errors or unnatural vocabulary. Remember, examiners don't care very much about 'advanced grammar' - it's all about level of error.

do we need to write three points to this essasy?

What an excellent essay Simon has written. I must say that it takes long way to reach to this standard. I feel disgusting while reading my essay after reading Simon's reply.

Such a class !!

Such a great essay with a band score 9 :D
Thank you very much, Simon! Your opinion is explained throughout the essay in a natural and effective way.

this is a very good essey it's not about simplicity
this essey is very clear and gives brief explanation and arguments

Pouyan is right, IELTS examiners here in Iran give no more than 6.5 to an essay like this.

Are you guys serious..?? or you are just trying to make Simon laugh ?
I think sjm has already explained it very well and I agree with that 100% !!!

simple words but good structure and style! like this!

Gday Simon,

I just want to say thank you so much! I've collected my result today and I've got 7 in each band. Your suggestions on writing are really impressive. Those IELTS courses outside are always play with vocabulary and complicated grammar which students are hard to reach in a short time. But your recommendations on structure, short introduction and conclusion are really helpful. Also, I concentrate on main body paragraphs like you said, and I connect my sentences cohesive like you mentioned, and I make my paragraph with one central topic and stay tight with my topic like you always suggested. I thought I was gonna get 6.5 or something this time but it just turned out 7. I think it is because I got 7 in cohesion and coherence. I didn't use big words a lot, and sentences were not complicated at all. Now I trust that IDP Australia does not cheat students. Not because I passed, it is because I passed when I thought I did a band 6 job.

The most important lesson I have learnt from writing test is that you need to always stay with your topic logically. If you have studied a bachelor degree in an English country, your vocabulary and grammar shouldn't be a problem, but don't try to play with big words and complicated grammar when you are not familiar with it. Just keep your explanation and your example related to your central topic.

Anyway, I will recommend this website to everyone like I always do. Because it is different with those "IELTS experts" outside, and it is created by a real ex-examiner of IELTS.

Congrats Keith, your words are an inspiration to every one here.

Congratulations, Keith from Sydney!
Thank you for sharing your own experience to get a wonderful band 7! I am also trying my best to focus on writing cohesively with my ideas supported throughout the essay, just as Simon and you mentioned. I agree with you that this website is really a great place for learning IELTS! And of course I always recommend it to anyone who wants to study for IELTS.
Once again, thank you! And IDP is really a good place to take the IELTS! :)

Hi simon hope u wud b fine, Im bit confused about new ielts system thts called SELTS. Those tests befor 6th April 2015 r only valid upto 5th November 2015. Are these rules for doctors as well? I called GMC, BRITISH COUNCIL AND UKVI but could not get proper information regarding this issue. I ve booked another test on 11th april in liverpool, so from whom i need to consult about this? If u have any kind of information abt this plz let us know it wud b a great help frm u .

kind regards

Hello everyone.I have an Academic exam on 18 April.I need to get at least 6 in writing exam.Here is my essay.Could you assess and give me feedback?
Thanks in advance.The topic is:
Many people are using credit cards or loans to run up huge personal debts that they may be unable to repay.It should therefore be made more difficult for individuals to borrow large amounts of momey.What are your opinions on this?
My essay:
Majority of individuals are utilizing credit cards or loans to run up huge amounts of personal debts that they may unable to pay back.As a consequence,it should be made more difficult for people to borrow large amounts of money.While I agree with this view,another solutions are to be taken into account.
On the one hand,credit cards and loans has several benefits.First of all,in recent years,the number of people who need credit cards has increased significantly since banks provide credit for every individuals who are working on the condition that they repay their debt on time.For instance,when people would like to purchase a new car or a new house,they do not struggle with borrowing money and they repay their debts in one or two years time or maybe more.In addition,provided people are aware of their expenditures and their budget,they can use credit cards.
On the other hand,credit cards and loans has several drawbacks and in order to prevent this several measurements should be considered.For instance,nowadays in many countries people whose salaries are minimum can take a credit cards or loans.As a result,it is likely that they are unable to repay their debt in the future and those people should not take huge amounts of credit.Furthermore,people ought to be conscious about their limits and unfortunately recently majority of people have a tendency to buy a luxury product although they can not afford.Moreover,banks need to create a block account for people who are not wealthy which means when their spendings exceed particular amount of money,banks need to restrict individuals’ account.
In conclusion,credit cards are used by many people to deal with their debts that they may unable to repay.So as to prevent this it is important that people need to be aware of their spendings and it should be made more difficult for people whose wages are minimum to borrow large amounts of money.

Hi Mehrunisa,

'SELTS' is not a new system. It just refers to the list of 'secure English language tests' that are trusted by the UK Government. IELTS is one of the trusted tests on the list.

IELTS is still on the 'SELTS' list, so all IELTS results are valid, regardless of the date. Don't worry about this - you should forget completely about this issue, and just worry about preparing for your test.

The most important lesson I have learnt from writing test is that you need to always stay with your topic logically. If you have studied a bachelor degree in an English country, your vocabulary and grammar shouldn't be a problem, but don't try to play with big words and complicated grammar when you are not familiar with it. Just keep your explanation and your example related to your central topic

Good topic

assume childcare responsibilities if this is what they wish to do.
maybe 'if this is' should be 'if these are' because responsibilities is pl.

Hi Simon!.I am very interested in your essays. It's normally very simple and easy to understand. But I also a have question about how to write a good essay in IELTS test? According to what i had learn in english center. My teacher often give us alot of sample of sentences which used in real test, but it is so difficult to learn. Can you tell me whether we should learn by heart these sentences to get high marks in IELTS test?

dear sir
please tell me how much paragraphs I should make in my essay.

Hi Simon,

Your sharing essay is really good to me. I learnt a lot from it. And I have to put a comment here to say "Thank you very much".

Cheers
Binh

NEEDS to work or NEED to work

Hi Praba,

Are you asking about the phrase "both marriage partners need to work"?

The noun is "partners", which is plural, so "need" is correct.

Hello everyone,
I have a question about "take on the role" from this essay, and I hope anyone who knows can help me.
Simon has written that'It is true that men are increasingly likely to take on the role of househusband, ' and the last sentence of the third paragraph,'Couples should be left to make their own decisions about which parental role each partner takes,...'.
I am confused why the second sentence can be written without the preposition 'on'?
Thanks for reading and looking forward to anyone's reply.

Hi Simon,
"Therefore, when couples have children, they may decide who works and who stays at home depending on the personal preference of each partner, or based on which partner earns the most money"
There is one point in this sentence that I don't understand. In a marriage, there are two partners so I think it should be "which partner earn more money" instead of most.
Thanks for reading, look forward to your reply.

Hello simon, here you can find my answer below and please can you score my answer? I need to take 6 band at least. Thanks..

Dear fellows, please dont hesitate to criticize and score my answer, i really need to checked by someone else..

In modern times, structure of the society and role of the individuals has changed, like everything. In the past, woman used to care all of the house works and man only focused to work outside and bring money to home. However with some shifts, this ruitine faced some upside down moments. In this essay I will explain the reasons for this novelty and in particular, In particular, I will tell my opinion at the end of the essay.

First of all, in todays world, most of the women’s education level increased significantly. Some of the surveys which conducted recently simple shows that even in the developing countries, females attending every aspect of the educational system. In addition to that they start to study master and take a place to some of the phd courses too.

Secondly, employers broke their habits in their minds and started to hire women employee to their firms. For instance in Jordan, number of women employes in every sector of business are almost equally with men employees number. Most of the firms choose female employees rather than male employees, because of their less amount of salary.

Thirdly, couples learned to make fairly decisions about their roles in home and especially in developed countries, society doesnt look different to man who look after their children.

In conclusion, I believe its a significant change for societys. Social responsibilities should not depend on sex and both of the partners should have a right to work or take care of house and look after children. Moreover, this role changes shows that eventually man and woman become equal.

with individuals we cannot use has

Amazingly well written. Very helpful!
Thank you Simon!

Three reasons:
Some male partners like to stay at home;
The partner with a high income is more likely to work;
Males and females have equal rights to choose to work or stay at home.

Negative:
It’s unreasonable to let female partners to take the responsibility to earn income for the entire families, and male partners should share the financial burden of their families.
From the traditional perspective, men should be the breadwinners of families, instead of women.
Some physical conditions of female determine that women are not suitable to bear working pressure as a main source of income of family.

can somebody say if I can gen 7 for this essay:
It is true that nowadays the number of fathers who are staying at home and looking after their children have been increased while the number of mothers who have jobs outside home are on the rise. This could be due to several reasons, and I believe this trend can have both advantages and disadvantages.
There are some key reasons why more fathers bear the responsibility of taking care of their children at home whereas more mothers work outside. Firstly, the equality between female and male genders has been increased compared with past, and women have become more social and play active roles in the societies. They contribute to the economy by working in occupations that they were not even allowed to do generations ago. Secondly, many countries give this chance to men to take long paternity leave in order to allow the couples to share their responsibilities of bringing up their children because they believe that psychologically a baby needs the presence of both of his or her parents equally. Finally, in some families, the woman has a more decent job with a higher salary that the man. If this is the case, they prefer to switch their roles.
However, staying fathers at home with children and mothers working out of home can have some benefits as well as drawbacks. A prime benefit is that children can build a strong emotional relationship with their fathers. This can be even useful when the baby is a boy because they will make themselves similar to their father in terms of male behaviors. A negative impact of the issue of employed mothers on children is that the babies may miss the breastfeeding which is very crucial for their health.
In conclusion, in some families for various reasons men prefer to stay at home while women choose to work outside of home. In my opinion, this trend has both pros and cons for the family.

School assignments are an important part of education, some people argue that students should not be given homework after school. I completely agree with this idea that students should be encouraged to engage in other activities after school.

There are several reasons why homework is vital for students. It helps students to develop a sense of responsibility. By being assigned a task one day and knowing what has to be done by the next day. This helps them to develop a sense of punctuality when they turn the work in on time. Furthermore, completing homework makes students smarter. It improves the functionality of their developing brains by challenging these young learners to recognize and negotiate the task. Consequently, these skills boost their ability in terms of problem-solving. Finally, homework provides students with an opportunity to involve their parents. When students are stuck on the task, they tend to ask their parents for the help. As such, it brings the relationship closer between students and their parents.

Despite all of these factors, there is still a valuable role for extracurricular activities that are engaged in as well as homework. I would argue that students should be encouraged to undertake in other activities that they are interested in after school. Students often find homework very boring and tedious, and they only do it because they are asked to. As a result, they might miss out on opportunities such as playing sports with others, activities that could improve their physical health and develop interpersonal skills, life skills that are arguably of equal importance to academic performance. Furthermore, children are perhaps exhausted after school, they would need to some time to relax and take their mind off work. The pressure of completing homework would result in adverse effects in their attitude towards learning.
In conclusion, while it seems requiring students to do homework can be beneficial, I believe that they should be engaged in other activities that help them grow too. Despite this, it cannot be denied that homework forms and essential part of a child’s education

Hi everyone.
Please tell me what kind of this essay is?
Thanks in advance!

It is true that traditional role of gender has changed to a certain degree that more fathers stay at home taking care of children. In my opinion, there are three reasons why this is the case, and it is certainly a positive development.

I think there are three reasons why more fathers choose to take care of children at home while more mothers go out as breadwinner. Firstly, in many developed countries, social-economic progress offers more opportunities of high salary jobs for women in today’s market than past. Unlike jobs in agriculture and factories that need strength and power, service sectors such as financial management allow women a level playing field with men, which need more intelligence and knowledge. Secondly, it is recognized that the proportion of female students has been increasing dramatically in recent years. Mothers with good education are more likely to be re-employed than traditional housewives. Finally, many people argue that there are some unique advantages of man in parenting children.

In my view, the shift of role between father and mother in home is surely a positive development. Firstly, from the point of view of children’s upbringing, fathers could help them to develop more braveness, courage, persistence and other man characteristics. Secondly, on the level of social equality, more working mother means less pay-gap between men and women, and therefore the equality between male and female would be greatly improved.

In conclusion, I believe that social-economic and education development are the main factors for more father parenting, and this is a positive development.


Hello sir I need your help ,since traveling abroad relatively inexpensive more countries opened their doors for foreign tourists .is it a positive or negative ? in this type of essay negative as well as positive both need to discuss.pls sir reply me because my test is on 1dec.

Does the third bp contain two main points or there is only one main point? This question has arisen in mind because i was not able to find any linking word between two points.

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